At home on a Saturday night. Phin peng (ex-school and nee soon campmate) called me, asking me to go and play mahjong with them until morning, and promised that there will be alcohol. It sounded very tempting, but I hardened briefly and told him “I’m sorry man, tomorrow morning I got church.”
Almost as soon as I hung up, I backed down and texted him that usually I could go to church in the afternoon but because tomorrow I have tuition as well so I just could not make it tonight. Some discipline I have, huh!
This is harder than I thought. I wanted to stop going drinking on Saturday nights and I thought I could do it because there’s still Wednesday mambo to make up for it. LOL. And besides school has started and I really don’t want to screw this sem up ,though I haven’t touched anything since the start of the year.
But when yh told me that they are going back to the states the following Monday, my heart kept itching to go. That, and I’m also afraid that no one will ever jio me on Saturday night again (which is already taking place these days), which means I will have to be at home on every single Saturday night, and that is quite a painful and lonely thought. I may be the “stay home and watch youtube” kinda person but seriously it really sucks to be indoors on sat nights! And I’m also not being needy because I know this WILL happen. It has happened to a few guys I know in church who have stopped hanging out with their friends on weekends. The fact that phin peng and I don’t meet up that often and that it’s his first time calling me since tennis last yr makes me want to go even more. C’mon man, it’s mahjong and alcohol with friends, how fun is that!
Turns out, I have a flu, and I guess I can’t go tomorrow morning either. Gosh, I’m such a sickly person. I gotta start exercising regularly soon.
Sigh, I’m still so distant from the person I want to be. And I’m not even trying to change!
